Welcome to the month of April. This month, I plan on discussing some books that feature the found/chosen family trope by authors who are openly LGBTQIA+. I wanted to take a moment to discuss this trope and why I think it’s important.
What is a chosen family?
Also called “found family” or “family of choice,” this is when someone builds a community around them of supportive people who act very much like a family.
The It Gets Better Project defines a chosen family as: “A group of people who are not necessarily biologically or legally related, but who play significant roles in each others lives, providing unconditional and mutual love and support.”
It’s important to remember that while sometimes chosen families are created to replace a blood family, they are also sometimes built in addition to (rather than in place of) their blood family. More on that in a minute.
Chosen families and the LGBTQIA+ community
Chosen families can be incredibly important to the LGBTQIA+ community. According to a Pew Research study, 39% of queer adults have faced rejection from their birth family. We’ve sadly seen this play out with Elon Musk’s trans daughter, Vivian Wilson. While I can’t speak to Vivian’s experiences, I think that chosen families can serve as an emotional support system for a lot of LGBTQIA+ folks who’ve been rejected by their family of origin.
There are other benefits of chosen families among LGBTQIA folks as well. For example:
40% of unhoused youth are part of the LGBTQIA+ community. As GLAAD points out, chosen families can help secure housing.
As members of the LGBTQIA+ community age, they often turn to their chosen family – not blood family – for support and care.
I previously mentioned that sometimes LGBTQIA+ folks will build chosen families in addition to blood ones. Some LGBTQIA+ folks will find that even if their blood relatives don’t outright reject them, they may not be well versed in what it means to be queer – especially if they’re not queer themselves and don’t have many queer people in their lives. A queer person may turn to a chosen family for things like mentorship. As this video points out, if you’re a trans woman who has never worn high heels before, you may not know how to find a pair in your size.
I’m just scratching the surface of why a chosen family can be important to members of the LGBTQIA+ community.
What’s in store
This month, I will be covering a handful of books that feature chosen families by authors – who, to the best of my knowledge – are out members of the LGBTQIA+ community. While not all the books I’ll be covering feature overtly queer characters, many of them do.
We’ll be discussing books featuring characters in chosen families for various reasons. Some were rejected by all or most of the family of origin, while others are building a chosen family in addition to their family of origin.
There’s a lot of books out there that fit this criteria and once again, I’ll just be scratching the surface of what’s out there. If you’re interested in a more comprehensive list of books, I’ve created a Google Doc featuring books that fit this criteria. If you’d like to take a peek, please sign up for my Email list and I’ll send it your way.
What are some of your favorite books featuring found families by LGBTQIA+ authors?
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